The Criminal History of Christianity by Karlheinz Deschner

Richard Dawkins and Karl Heinrich Leopold Deschner

Karl Heinrich Leopold Deschner (born on May 23, 1924, in Bamberg, Germany), is a German researcher and writer who has achieved public attention in Europe for his thorough and critical treatment of Christianity (and Catholicism in particular) as expressed in articles and books (that have appeared thus far in Spanish, Italian, Polish and his native German), culminating in his magum opus The Criminal History of Christianity (Kriminalgeschichte des Christentums, Rowohlt Verlag GmbH, Reinbek) which is planned in 10 volumes, of which 9 have been published so far.

Hans Kung (bestselling Catholic theologian) speaking about Deschner:

During the time of the Second Vatican Council (1962-1965) the Catholic Church enjoyed a generally high public standing. At the beginning of the third millennium after Christ, however, it is being attacked more than ever in some quarters. Granted, Rome has recently been asking for forgiveness for the monstrous errors and atrocities of the past—but in the meantime, the present-day church administration and Inquisition are producing still more victims. Scarcely any of the great institutions in our democratic age deal in such a despicable way with critics and those of other views in their own ranks, nor does any discriminate so much against women—by prohibiting contraceptives, the marriage of priests, and the ordination of women. None polarizes society and politics worldwide to such a degree by rigid positions in matters of abortion, homosexuality, and euthanasia, positions always invested with an aura of infallibility, as if they were the will of God himself. In view of the apparent inability on the part of the Catholic Church to correct and reform itself, is it not understandable that at the beginning of the third Christian millennium the more or less benevolent indifference widely shown to the church around fifty years ago has turned into hatred, indeed, public hostility? Antagonistic church historians and critics are of the opinion that in the churchʼs two-thousand-year history no organic process maturing [of doctrines and dogmas] can be detected, but rather something more like a criminal history. A once-Catholic author, Karlheinz Deschner, has devoted his life and so far six [now nine, with a tenth on the way] volumes to such a history. In it he describes every possible form of criminality in the churchʼs foreign policy and in policies relating to trade, finance, and education; in the dissemination of ignorance and superstition; in the unscrupulous exploitation of sexual morality, marriage laws, and penal justice… and so on, for hundreds [now 8,000] pages.*

*Though Drescherʼs works have translated into several European languages only a few paragraphs have thus far been translated into English (see below)—but if one is interested in present-day religion-related abuses and crimes, click here.

Synopsis Of Christianityʼs Criminal History, Volume 7, 13th and 14th Centuries by Karlheinz Deschner:

“The Middle Ages,” noted Nietzsche, “is the era of the greatest passions.” How these passions expressed themselves in the 13th and 14th Centuries is related by Karlheinz Deschner in the newest volume of his Christianityʼs Criminal History.

At the beginning of this epoch stood Emperor Henry VI, who claimed for himself dominium mundi, world rule—with or without the blessing of the Pope. At the end stood Emperor Charles IV, who ruled the Holy Roman Empire until 1378. The most powerful ecclesiastical opponent of this imperium was Pope Gregory IX (1227 to 1241), who demanded from the emperor his right to crusades and who managed internal security by means of the Inquisition.

Events of this period: the decisive power struggle between emperor and papacy, the fall of the Hohenstauffen and the end of papal universal domination, the papal bull “Unam Sanctam,” the Mongol Invasion, the Sicilian Vesper, the “Babylonian Captivity” of the popes in exile in Avignon, increasingly devastating anti-Jewish pogroms, crusades in every direction, among them that of Frederick II, the Crusades of Louis I the Holy to Egypt and Tunis, the Crusades of Christians against Christians, against the Albigensians, the Stedinger, the grotesque Childrenʼs Crusade, the destruction of the Templars, the destruction of the Pastorells, the notorious terrorist regime of the German Order, the extermination of the “heathen” in the Northeast of Europe, the suppression of the Balts, the Prussians — and not least the totalitarian Inquisition meant to suppress every stirring of intellectual freedom.

Deschnerʼs meticulous, irrefutable presentation of evidence from eye witnesses who were previously silenced or distorted reveals the very Christian Middle Ages as the high water mark of ruthless power politics involving both secular thrones and the Holy See.

Excerpts From Christianityʼs Criminal History, Volume 7, 13th and 14th Centuries by Karlheinz Deschner:

In the course of sacred history punishments became more and more severe and salutary. The Councils of Reims in 1157 and Oxford in 1160 had imposed facial branding on heretics. Even Innocent III threatened the Albigenses at first “only” with banishment and confiscation. But thereafter capital punishment became more and more frequent with various forms of execution appearing. In Cologne, Nuremberg and Regensburg “heretics” were occasionally drowned, in Würzburg beheaded, but death by fire became the rule for such an offense.

Death by fire, usually on a holiday, became a demonstration of the Churchʼs virtual omnipotence, as a grandiose ritual sacrifice, more popular than any other religious holiday. This human sacrifice was given a Portuguese name, autodafé, which in Latin is actus fidei. It was “an act of faith,” unquestionably the most ardent in the history of religion. Special couriers spread the invitation, the condemned were led forth before crowds of onlookers, special prices were paid for window seats, and every good Catholic who could bring forth wood for the fire was certain of a welcome absolution. This splendid opportunity has been denied the Catholic world since the 19th Century, for the last autodafé was probably celebrated in Mexico in 1815 (the first in 1481 in Seville).

Spiritual and worldly princes participated. The Grand Inquisitor handed over the condemned to the civil authorities following high mass and a sermon in a public square or house of God, not without expressing his heartfelt wish that the “life and limbs” of these people might be spared. The condemned were brought to the place of execution, usually wearing a foolʼs cap to symbolize their mindless perversity, clothed in bright yellow sackcloth and covered with the most outrageous images of the Devil, so that even the most dimwitted Catholic might easily recognize the spiritual father of these miscreants. These bystanders would often express their brotherly love in the usual fashion: by beating the condemned with canes, pinching them with glowing tongs and sometimes chopping off their right hands. In order to spare the delicate sensibilities of Godʼs people, the “heretics” were often gagged to muffle their screams, so that nothing could be heard but the almost cozy crackling of the flames and the chanting of the priests. And while the victims, depending on wind direction, either suffocated or slowly roasted to death, the assembled Christian community, nobility, common people and clergy, all sang: “Almighty God, we praise Thee.”

The courts of the Inquisition were the noblest courts of the Church and shielded from every profane influence. They were deemed immune to corruption; they usually adorned themselves with the attributes “holy” and “most holy.” For the filthier something is, the more it must be verbally rid of filth, embellished, ennobled, elevated to glory and majesty.

Official Church proclamations glorified the Inquisition, as did popes such as Innocent IV and Clemens IV in their papal bulls of March 23, 1254 and February 26, 1266. The inquisitors themselves were placed in an illustrious line of descent stretching back to an entire gallery of glorious Old Testament gangsters, with Saul, e.g., with David (I, 85 ff.!), Joshua (I, 83 f.) and others. But even Jesus, John the Baptist and Peter were numbered in the inquisitorial pedigree. Indeed, God Himself, the expeller of Adam and Eve from Paradise, was viewed as nothing less than the first “inquisitor.” These murdering thugs were in any case agents of the pope. Their derived their plenipotentiary authority everywhere and at all times from him alone.

Prisons of the Inquisitions, Places of Unspeakable Cruelty

The courts of the Inquisition were opened by an invocation to the Holy Spirit [whom, it is promised to believers in the NT, “will lead you unto all truth”].

Prayer also preceded the pronouncement of judgment.

The verdict, however, even in cases of extreme doubt, was not subject to appeal to secular courts, which functioned merely as an executive tool of the Church courts, whose sentences they were to carry out “blindly” (coeca obedientia) and “with closed eyes” (oculis clausis).

Numerous papal bulls sharply admonished the princes to damn well do their duty. Not only the doges of Venice were finally obliged by their oath of office to burn heretics. Otto IV of the Welf dynasty promised “effective support” in the eradication of “evil heresies” as much as his opponent, Frederick II of the Hohenstaufen dynasty, who in fact went further and demanded of all his subordinates, consuls, and rectors that “they in their respective lands make every effort to exterminate everyone designated by the Church as a heretic.” This obligation was confirmed by a public oath, under penalty of deposition and loss of their lands. These oaths proved to be effective.

The popes did everything in their power to ensure that the demands and orders of the inquisitors be quickly obeyed, that the inquisitors themselves be granted armed escort, and especially that the inquisitorial decrees be incorporated into the secular law codes. Innocent IV wrote in his bull “Cum adversus haereticam” of May 28, 1252:

“As the Holy Roman Emperor Frederick has pass certain laws against the heretical evil, by which laws the spread of this plague might be hindered, and as we desire that these laws be observed for the strengthening of the faith and the salvation of the faithful, so we order the beloved sons who are in authority to incorporate these laws, whose exact wording is attached, into their statues, and to proceed against the heretics with great zeal. Therefore we order you [the inquisitors], when these authorities fulfill our orders carelessly, to force them to compliance by means of excommunication and interdiction … We utterly curse those who have fallen from the Catholic faith, we pursue them with punishment, we rob them of their fortunes, deny them succession and revoke any and all their rights.”

The usual punishment for “heretics” was incarceration, often for life. In a partially preserved register of sentences of the Inquisition in Toulouse from the years 1246 to 1248, of 149 prisoners six were serving 10 years, 16 an indeterminate time based on the discretion of the Church, and 127 were serving life terms.

The prisons of the Inquisition were places of unimaginable cruelty, dark and confined by papal prescription, usually without any light or ventilation but full of filth and stench. The clergy filled these places to the point that Gregory IX ordered the building of more and promised generous indulgences to Christians who would contribute to their construction. Sentences served in these hellholes were far worse than any quick death by fire at the stake. Men and women often languished for years without being sentenced or acquitted. A man by the name of Wilhelm Salavert was first interrogated on February 24, 1300 and finally sentenced on September 30, 1319, after 19 years of uninterrupted misery. A woman in Toulouse was “reprieved to bearing the Cross” after lying in the local prisons for 33 years.

(from Karlheinz Deschnerʼs Christianityʼs Criminal History, Volume 7, p. 260 ff.)

Torture, the Most Compelling Instrument of Christian Brotherly Love

Of the three types of Inquisitorial conviction—purification, recantation, torture—“torture is the most suitable. Because heresy is difficult to prove, the judge of the Inquisition should be inclined toward the use of torture: ad torturam judex debet esse promptior.” (Antonius Diana, Consultant to the Sicilian Inquisition)

Augustine, both saint and doctor of the Church and the archetype of all medieval “heretic”-hunters, had already allowed torture against the Donatists, defending it as a trifle when compared to the agonies of hell. He called it a “cure,” an “emendatio.”

Bishop Anselm of Lucca among others in the 11th Century further developed Augustineʼs “heresy” argumentation. Expelled by his own clergy in 1080, he had a quite correct understanding of Augustine: proceeding against evil is not persecution but an expression of love. And Bishop Bonizo of Sutri, blinded and maimed by his own Christians in 1089, called for “combating” schismatics and worse dissenters “with all vigor and weapons.” He did not hesitate to attribute to Augustine the view “that all those are blessed who persecute for the sake of righteousness.”

This most compelling instrument of Christian brotherly love was already being employed north of the Alps during the Carolingian period but did not being to flourish until the 13th Century when Innocent IV, in his bull “Ad exstirpanda” of 1252, called for the use of torture and its canonical regulation in the fight against “heretics” in northern Italy. This policy expanded to include all of Italy in 1256 and was confirmed in the following years by Popes Alexander IV and Clemens IV.

In 1261 Urban IV allowed inquisitors, under whose robust manner of opinion research delinquents might expire, to mutually absolve one another. It was after all not permitted to torture to death a person being questioned. In such a case the inquisitor would face excommunication, from which he could be immediately freed, however, by a priest of the Inquisition uttering the formula: “Ego te absolvo.”

(from Karlheinz Deschnerʼs Christianityʼs Criminal History, Volume 7, p. 266ff)

REVIEWS of Deschnerʼs “Christianityʼs Criminal History”:

“How a religion of love became a religion of worldly power—provocative, discomforting, richly detailed: Karlheinz Deschnerʼs ambitious Christianityʼs Criminal History”—Prof. Ludger Lütkehaus, Badische Zeitung, 29.11.1988

“A shocking panorama of fraud and deceit, blood and murder under the sign of the Cross … The author recounts conscientiously, even in pedantic detail, the multitude of clerical, Christian crimes dating back to the earliest days of the Church. He demolishes with crushing blows monumental figures such as the great Constantine … The venerable doctors of the Church such as Athanasius, Ambrose, and Augustine lose their halos entirely… . Of course there is another side to the story… But that does not negate Deschnerʼs account. He brings to light what has been diligently suppressed, falsified, and played down through two Christian millennia.”—Heinz Schönfeldt, «Mannheimer Morgen»

“Deschner doesnʼt believe in wounding blows. He goes for the throat … And what is the result? A mammoth project. The crowing completion of a lifelong altercation: Christianityʼs Criminal History.”—Dietmar Bittrich, «Hamburger Abendblatt»

“A standard work based on a thorough study of the sources… The absolutely breathtaking descriptions, whose factual content are irrefutable, present a single, massive indictment of Christianity and show to what astonishing degree the gospel of love and mercy preached by Jesus was betrayed again and again. A book which will challenge and shake those above all who cherish a heartfelt commitment to the message of the Gospel.”—Lieselotte von Eltz-Hoffmann, «Salzburger Nachrichten»

“Deschner is not a modern Don Quixote, nor a Michael Kohlhaas. He is a modern proponent of the Enlightenment who still believes in the power of reason. He does not perceive the necessity of a new myth to replace a demystified Christianity no longer able to offer salvation. This fact distinguishes him from some modern critics of the Church who still feel allegiance to some interpretation of primitive Christianity. Deschner is without compromise in this regard.”—Rolf Gawrich, «Frankfurter Rundschau»

“Christianityʼs Criminal History is the name of this work which has now expanded to two volumes and which will eventually encompass a few more volumes as an opus maximum: in its projected entirety probably the most comprehensive critical history of Christianity ever. The title is intended in its absolute, literal sense. Deschner is set on laying forth an uncompromising account of Christianityʼs ‘history of crime.’ The spine title, formulated perhaps out of publication considerations, expresses extenuating circumstances which the book itself does not offer. And ‘Christianityʼs Criminal History’ is also to be understood in the sense of criminal detection, proof and exposure of the crime and the culprits. The halo which has customarily surrounded said criminal history is relentlessly attacked by Deschner as a monstrous hypocrisy.

The monumental figures of sacred history are in fact toppled right and left: the church doctors, the dogmatic patriarchs, the early popes, the “most” Christian emperors: Ambrose, Augustine, Athanasius, Basil, Clemens, Eusebius, Jerome, Irenaeus, Lactantius… A litany of saints of blessed memory becomes an unholy litany of scoundrels one would prefer to forget. Volume 1 is already in its fifth printing and covers the time from Old Testament origins to the death of Saint Augustine. Volume 2 deals with that period from the Catholic “children emperors” to the extermination of the Arian Vandals and Ostrogoths under Justinian I. What these two books reveal is a blood-drenched trail as remote as one can imagine from a message of love and mercy, not a story of salvation but a monstrous catastrophe. In this context, the expression “Christian persecutions” acquires a painfully ironic twist: out of the victims arise the oppressors.

Marshalling arguments against this awful compilation of factual evidence will be difficult. It may be that Deschner in cases of doubt always decides against the accused. As a whole, however, this massive study, whose origins date back to the 1950s, is painstakingly thorough and researched with a scholarly diligence without equal. The first two volumes contain almost 2,000 secondary titles, 130 pages of footnotes and annotations, in addition to a user-friendly, detailed index, all of which makes this compendium of crime a fatally effective reference work. This impressive apparatus also conveys a simple message: the author knows that in spite of all the recognition heʼs received — in 1988 he received the Arno-Schmidt-Prize for his uncompromising literary production — he is not going to be easily, at any rate not voluntarily believed.”—Prof Dr. Ludger Lütkehaus, «Freiburger Universitätsblätter» herausgegeben im Auftrag des Rektors der Albert-LudwigsUniversität Freiburg

“Deschnerʼs Christianityʼs Criminal History should not be absent from any serious scholarly library. It is a standard work, an organon including all the major themes, a necessary corrective of great value belonging on the shelf next to the works of Augustine, the Summa Theologiae of Thomas Aquinas and the Lexica für Theologie und Kirche of our own day.“—Helmut Häußler, Freigeistige Aktion, Hannover

“I am reminded of 18th Century proponents of the Enlightenment such as the Frenchmen Pierre Bayle, Claude Helvetius, and Voltaire or the German poet Heinrich Heine. Now the 20th Century also has its book, Deschnerʼs Christianityʼs Criminal History.… Thanks to Deschnerʼs back-breaking research, the suspicion that Christianity has skeletons in its closet becomes an absolutely certainty. Widely known facts are beginning to replace mere suspicions, and what we learn about reality exceeds even the products of our fantasy.”—Prof. Dr. theol. Horst Herrmann, Der Spiegel

“The Criminal History is a massive work, a lifeʼs work, perhaps the centuryʼs work. So brilliant is the analysis and captivating the style, bold, cutting, skilful, never looking back or down; independent, creative greatness at work.”—Volker A. Zahn, Kölner Illustrierte

“Deschnerʼs Criminal History not just fills a huge gap. It is THE standard work of alternative church history. With his stupendous, comprehensive grasp of detail, the author of this work of the century makes a pressing, existential issue out of the lives and views of those who have defied the Church through the centuries.”—Prof. Dr. theol. Hubertus Mynarek

Quotations from Drescher:

My skepticism keeps me from becoming a fanatic, which is something no faith has ever achieved.

“I would rather err with the majority than in my own way,” so thought St. Augustine. I am just the opposite.

The superstition that a belief based on faith is different from a superstition is the greatest superstition of all.

SNIPPETS from Drescher, cited in someone elseʼs article on the web:

“The Churchʼs efforts of putting an end to the common practice of plundering shipwrecked sailors in the Middle Ages, didnʼt include Arabs or other infidels. The Church didnʼt see any wrong in sending non-Christian prisoners of war into slavery. In the 17th century the Scottish clergy teached that one under no circumstances whatsoever should give food or shelter to a hungry human being if he didnʼt have an orthodox Christian faith (Deschner).

The ninth commandment of not bearing false witness seems to be a tough one for God himself since he tells lies via his own prophets (1 Kings 22:23, 2.Chr. 18:22. Jer. 4:10, 20:7 Ezek 14:9) and deceives(2.Thess 2:11-12). St Paul also admits using lies and deception to spread the word of God (Rom 3:7, 1.Cor 1:19-23). The biblical texts also forge the very word of God (Jer. 8:8). Jehovah also admits this in Ezek 20,25 “Wherefore I gave them also statutes that were not good, and judgments whereby they should not live.” Even the noble Church Father Origen thinks it should be allowed to lie and deceive to save souls. According to Origen Godʼs love justifies him using lies. Church father John Chrysostom (Golden mouth) thought lies were necessary for saving the soul (Deschner Karlheinz, 1972: ”Abermals krähte der Hahn” Stuttgart, p. 30). Bishop and Church historian Euseb of Cæsarea (ca 265-430 AD) claimed openly that the Church should use deception and fraud if it was in the interest of the Church. The founder of the Jesuit order, Ignatius Loyola, wrote in the 16 th century ”We should always be open for what seems white to us, in reality is black if the leaders of the Church should decide so.”

Additional Books by Deschner

Why I Left the Church (1970)—a book of testimonies from people who left the fold. With contributions by G. von Frankenberg, K. Port, R. Mächler, J. Bjorneboe, F. Vester, G. Zwerenz, K. Harpprecht, W. Baranowsky, O.F. Gmelin, W. Beutin, H. Wollschläger, J. Kahl

Memento! (1999)—A Little Lesson About the “Great Act of Atonement” of the Pope in the Holy Year 2000. In the Holy Year 2000 the Pope asked forgiveness for his organization in a “great act of atonement” from all the millions of victims of crimes committed in the name of Christ through the centuries. Deschner helps the Holy Father search his conscience. Every line of this deeply disturbing litany of crimes cries out “Remember!” - “Memento!”

TV Program About Deschner, on Youtube.com, in Seven Parts (in German)
1/7 Die hasserfüllten Augen des Herrn Deschner

C. S. Lewis: Provocative, Poignant & Profound Words

C S Lewis

“I envy you not having to think any more about Christian apologetics. My correspondents force the subject on me again and again. It is very wearing, and not v. good for oneʼs own faith. A Christian doctrine never seems less real to me than when I have just (even if successfully) been defending it. It is particularly tormenting when those who were converted by my books begin to relapse and raise new difficulties.” C. S. Lewis to Mary Van Deusen, June 18, 1956 [1]

“One of the things Christians are disagreed about is the importance of their disagreements. When two Christians of different denominations start arguing, it is usually not long before one asks whether such-and-such a point ‘really matters’ and the other replies: ‘Matter? Why, itʼs absolutely essential.’” C. S. Lewis, Preface to Mere Christianity

To Mary Willis Shelburne, April 26, 1956: “Of course we have all been taught what to do with suffering — offer it in Christ to God as our little, little share of Christʼs sufferings — but it is so hard to do. I am afraid I can better imagine, than really enter into, this. I suppose that if one loves a person enough one would actually wish to share every part of his life: and I suppose the great saints thus really want to share every part of his life: and I suppose the great saints thus really want to share the divine sufferings and that is how they can actually desire pain. But this is far beyond me. To grin and bear it and (in some feeble, desperate way) to trust is the utmost most of us can manage. One tries to take a lesson not only from the saints but from the beasts: how well a sick dog trusts one if one has to do things that hurt it! And this, I know, in some measure you will be able to do.” [2]

To John Beversluis, July 3, 1963 (the year of C. S. Lewisʼ death): “The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not ‘so thereʼs no God after all,’ but, ‘So this is what God is really like. Deceive yourself no longer.’”[3] Only four months before his death, Lewis wrote in a letter to an American philosopher that there were dangers in judging God by moral standards. However, he maintained that “believing in a God whom we cannot but regard as evil, and then, in mere terrified flattery calling Him ‘good’ and worshipping Him, is still greater danger.”[4]

Lewis was responding specifically to the question of Joshuaʼs slaughter of the Canaanites by divine decree and Peterʼs striking Ananias and Sapphira dead.

Knowing that the evangelical doctrine of the Bibleʼs infallibility required him to approve of “the atrocities (and treacheries) of Joshua,” Lewis made this surprising concession: “The ultimate question is whether the doctrine of the goodness of God or that of the inerrancy of Scriptures is to prevail when they conflict. I think the doctrine of the goodness of God is the more certain of the two indeed, only that doctrine renders this worship of Him obligatory or even permissible.” [5]

“To this some will reply ‘ah, but we are fallen and donʼt recognize good when we see it.’ But God Himself does not say that we are as fallen at all that. He constantly, in Scripture, appeals to our conscience: ‘Why do ye not of yourselves judge what is right?’ — ‘What fault hath my people found in me?’ And so on. Socratesʼ answer to Euthyphro is used in Christian form by Hooker. Things are not good because God commands them; God commands certain things because he sees them to be good. (In other words, the Divine Will is the obedient servant to the Divine Reason.) The opposite view (Ockhamʼs, Paleyʼs) leads to an absurdity. If ‘good’ means ‘what God wills’ then to say ‘God is good’ can mean only ‘God wills what he wills.’ Which is equally true of you or me or Judas or Satan.” [6]

To Dom Bede Griffiths, Dec. 20, 1961: “Even more disturbing as you say, is the ghastly record of Christian persecution. It had begun in Our Lordʼs time - ‘Ye know not what spirit ye are of’ (John of all people!)[7] I think we must fully face the fact that when Christianity does not make a man very much better, it makes him very much worse…Conversion may make of one who was, if no better, no worse than an animal, something like a devil.”[8]

Notes

  1. Lewis, The Collected Letters of C. S. Lewis, Volume III, p. 762.
  2. Lewis, The Collected Letters of C. S. Lewis, Volume III, p. 743.
  3. C.S. Lewis, A grief Observed (New York: Seabury Press, 1963), pp 9-10.
  4. Letter quoted in full in John Beversluis, C.S. Lewis and the Search for Rational Religion (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1985), pp. 156 f.
  5. Ibid., p. 157. Emphsis added.
  6. Cited in ibid., p 157.
  7. In the “Gospel of John,” Jesusʼ enemies are depicted more than sixty times as simply, “The Jews.” Jesusʼ concern for Israel as seen in the Gospel of Matthew (10:5-6 & 15:24) is absent from the Jesus who appears in the Gospel of John (5:45-47 & 8:31-47). The Gospel John, having been written after previous Gospels may reflect the growing breakdown of relations between the early Christian church and the Jewish synagog.
  8. The Letters of C. S. Lewis, ed., W. H. Lewis, (New York: Harcourt, Brace & World, Inc., 1966), p. 301.

Additional Statements

From The Collected Letters of C. S. Lewis, Volume III

1960

To Mary Willis Shelburne, March 26, p 1141: “Things are not, or not much, worse with us, but life is very terrible. I sometimes feel I am mad to be taking Joy [Lewisʼs wife, suffering from cancer] to Greece in her present condition, but her heart is set upon it. They give the condemned man what he likes for his last breakfast, I am told.”

To Mary Willis Shelburne, April 19, p 1147: “We did get to Greece, and it was a wonderful success. Joy performed prodigies, climbing to the top of the Acropolis and getting as far as the Lion gate of Mycenae. She has (no wonder) come back v. exhausted and full of aches. But I wd. not have had her denied it… She was absolutely enraptured by what she saw.”

“I canʼt begin to describe Greece. Attica is hauntingly beautiful and Rhodes is an earthly paradise — all orange and lemon orchards and wild flowers and vines and olives, and the mountains of Asia on the horizon. And lovely, cheap wines. Iʼve eaten squid and octopus!”

To Chad Walsh, May 23, p 1154: “I had some ado to prevent Joy (and myself) from relapsing into Paganism in Attica! At Daphni it was hard not to pray to Apollo the Healer. But somehow one didnʼt feel it wd. have been very wrong — wd. have only been addressing Christ sub specie Apollinis.”

To the Rev. Peter Bide, July 14, p 1169: “Joy died at 10 oʼclock last night in the Radcliffe… Iʼd like to meet. Perhaps I cd. come up to town some day when you are in town and take you to lunch at the Athenaeum. For I am — oh God that I were not — very free now. One doesnʼt realise in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy one must be tied. God bless all three of us.”

A note on p 1182 refers to Lewisʼs writing about his grieving process in letters after Joyʼs death in July, and also his undertaking almost immediately to write A Grief Observed, his journal of the grieving process. Writes editor Hooper: “he followed the advice he had given Arthur Greeves many years ago: ‘Start writing: ink is the great cure for all human ills.’”

To Mary Willis Shelburne, September 24, p 1188, “As to how I take sorrow, the answer is ‘In nearly all the possible ways.’ Because, as you probably know, it isnʼt a state but a process. It keeps on changing — like a winding road with quite a new landscape at each bend. Two curious discoveries I have made. The moments at which you call most desperately and clamorously to God for help are precisely those when you seem to get none. And the moments at which I feel nearest to Joy are precisely those when I mourn her least. Very queer. In both cases a clamorous need seems to shut one off from the thing needed. No one ever told me this. It is almost like ‘Donʼt knock and it shall be opened to you.’ I must think it over.”

To Robin Anstey, November 2, p 1206: “S.F. [science fiction] — however bad most of it is — is now the chief vehicle for ‘thoughts that wander up and down eternity.’ How trivial, by comparison, are most of the issues presented by our ‘serious’ novelists!”

To Meredith Lee, December 6, p 1213: “Why did I become a writer? Chiefly, I think, because my clumsiness of fingers prevented me from making things in any other way. See my Surprised by Joy, chapter 1.”

Same, p 1214: “I have, as usual, dozens of ‘plans’ for books, but I donʼt know which, if any, of these will come off. Very often a book of mine gets written when Iʼm tidying a drawer and come across notes for a plan rejected by me years ago, and now suddenly realise I can do it after all. This, you see, makes predictions rather difficult!”

Same: “I enjoy writing fiction more than writing anything else. Wouldnʼt anyone?”

1961

To Mary Van Deusen, February 13, p 1238, refers to French existentialist novelist Sartre “as an artist in French prose [who] has a sort of wintry grandeur which partly explains his immense influence.”

1962

To Mary Van Deusen, June 10, p 1349: “My friend Charles Williams had a high opinion of Kierkegaard and on that ground I am ready to believe there must be a lot in him. But I could not find it myself. Perhaps I did not give him a long enough trial. I may yet give him another. I have in my time had to change my opinion about a good many authors!“

To Edward A. Allen, December 10, p 1389: “I discovered only the other day that Christmas presents had begun in the time of St. Augustine, and he called them ‘diabolical’ because they originated not in Christmas but in the Pagan Saturnalia. Diabolical is a bit strong: perhaps ‘a darn nuisance’ wd. be more accurate.” Or…bah humbug?

To Mary Willis Shelburne, October 26, p 1376: “I am sorry to hear of the little dogʼs death. The animal creation is a strange mystery. We can make some attempt to understand human suffering: but the sufferings of animals from the beginning of the world till now (inflicted not only by us but by one another) — what is one to think? And again, how strange that God brings us into such intimate relations with creatures of whose real purpose and destiny we remain forever ignorant. We know to some degree what angels and men are for. But what is a flea for, or a wild dog? What you say about the VII Day Adventists interests me extremely. If they have so much charity there must be something very right about them.”

1963

To Joan Lancaster, July 11, p 1440: “Zoroastrianism is one of the finest of the Pagan religions. Do you depend entirely on Nietzsche for your idea of it? I expect you wd. find it well worth time to look at the old sources.”

To Mary Van Deusen, November 16, p 1480: “There are times when I wonder if the invention of the internal combustion engine was not an even greater disaster than that of the hydrogen bomb!”

Five Questions For Christians

The God Question
  1. What keeps people in heaven from committing evil, or making someone else suffer in some way? Anything preventing people in heaven from doing that? Or can Christians in heaven later commit evils, create suffering, maybe even wind up damned?

  2. Does God have free will? If so, then can God choose to do evil? If not, why not?

    A related question, is the free will of human beings to do evil, something that even God lacks? And if so, doesnʼt that make human free will something new, in a category by itself, something even God does not possess?

  3. Are there other things that God lacks? Can God “suffer?” Did any “suffering” ever exist inside God before He created the first sentient being that “displeased” Him? Or is “suffering” something new that only arose after God created sentient beings?

  4. Did God create solely out of His own will, intelligence, power and love? Then how could anything that came SOLELY out of perfect intelligence, power, and love, wind up as imperfect as this cosmos?

    Life in this cosmos is only possible on a tiny sliver of one planetʼs shaky surface, with life eating life, mass extinction events, and all living things eventually dying. Life, at best, is in equilibrium with death in our cosmos, thatʼs what we know for sure. We do not see people popping out of graves after being dead for three days, nor people rising into the clouds, nor cities (like the “New Jerusalem” mentioned in the last few chapters of Revelation) descending out of heaven above.

  5. Whatʼs the point of arguing with Hell-Believing Christians Over The Problem Of Evil? According to Christian orthodoxy, The Problem Of Evil/Suffering is writ even larger in the next life than in this one. And since so many Christians take for granted eternal suffering and are willing to justify it as part of what they are taught “in the Bible,” then whatʼs the point of arguing about suffering with a Christian like that? They already justify eternal suffering in their own minds, so no tsunami or mass extinction is going to sway them otherwise.

    Personally, I see Christianity as a roach motel of the mind, or like Chinese handcuffs, i.e., people are attracted by the outward love and trappings, and then once inside, they canʼt get their minds out again, because of fear of eternal suffering. Doubt itself becomes a sin. So they wind up justifying every pain and evil, including eternal suffering.

    I think youʼll find that those Christians who DO come to doubt the logic of eternal suffering are the ones most likely to turn to some version of Christian annihilationism, or universalism, or at least a broader, more inclusive hope for salvation, and find those types of answers more comforting than belief in an orthodox hell of eternal suffering in which a jealous God punishes people for eternity.

Challenge To Christians: Judge Not? Or Curse? The Bible Contains A Range of Responses, So You Have to Decide

Judge Not

How does one reconcile ALL of the biblical instructions that I list below? Jesus judged and even cursed people, aiming most of them at the Pharisees (Gospel of Matthew) and at “the Jews” (Gospel of John) saying “ye know whose children ye are” [Satanʼs]). While Paul said, “may their knife slip” when speaking of “the circumcisers.” Paul also cursed certain people and declared them “anathema.” BUT Christians are also commanded to NOT judge anyone outside (or inside) the church (depending on the verse), and commanded to act “meekly” and “humbly” even in the face of curses from others and certain death:

2 Peter 2:21-23 To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.” When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.

Numbers 12:3 Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth.

2 Cor. 10:1 I, Paul, myself urge you by the meekness and gentleness of Christ— I who am meek when face to face with you, but bold toward you when absent!

1 Corinthians 4:5 Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of menʼs hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God.

Matthew 5:5,7,9,44 Blessed are the meek… Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy…Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God… I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,…

Psalm 34:14b …seek peace and pursue it.

Proverbs 17:5b, 24:17, 25:21 (New International Version) Whoever gloats over disaster will not go unpunished. Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he s tumbles, do not let your heart rejoice… If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.

Colossians 4:5-6 (NLT) “Live wisely among those who are not Christians and make the most of every opportunity. Let your converstation be gracious and effective so that you will have the right answer for everyone.”

Colossians 3:8 &17 “But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander and dirty language…‘And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through Him to God the Father.’”

I Corinthians 5:12,13 “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. ‘Expel the wicked man from among you.’”

James 4:11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.

James 4:12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?

Apparently a lot is left up to individuals to determine for themselves how best to act. The famed Scottish Christian, Thomas Erskine, put it this way:

The most zealous defenders of the verbal inspiration of the Bible admit that there are parts of it of less importance than others. This is a great admission, because another is involved in it, namely that we ourselves must be judges of the comparative importance of these different parts.


Also compare the following verses:

Job 5:2 says, “For wrath kills the foolish man, and envy slays the silly one.” So “wrath” is connected with “the foolish man” yet compare:

Let me [Yahweh] alone that my wrath may wax hot against them.
- Exodus 32:10 (See also Numbers 16:46)

The Lord shall swallow them up in his wrath, and the fire shall devour them.
- Psalm 21:9

God often angrily loses his temper:

That the Lord may turn from the fierceness of his anger.
- Deut. 13:17

He made Israel to sin to provoke the Lord God of Israel to anger with their vanities.
- 1 Kings 16:26 (See also: Ex. 32:10; Num. 11:1,16:46, 32:13-14; Judges 3:8, 2:20; 1 Kings 14:9,15:30, 16:2, 16:7, 16:13; 2 Kings 13:3; 2 Samuel 24:1; 2 Chron. 34:25; Psalm 18:7 & Jer. 44:6; Nahum 1:2)


Or take the story about Moses descending from a mountain holding Ten Commandments, one of which says, “Do not kill.” But Moses saw that some of the people had begun worshipping idols, and he says, “Kill every man your [idol worshipping] neighbor.” (Ex. 32:27)

So, depending on the circumstances, we have either “Love your neighbor” (Lev. 19:18 & the Gospels), or, “Kill every man your neighbor.” (Ex. 32:27)

And the same Moses who taught “Do not kill” also commanded the Israelites to “kill every [Midianite] male among the little ones?” (Num. 31:17)


And what about the use of the word “Blessed” to describe two very different sentiments in Matthew 5:9 and Psalm 137:9, respectively:

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.”

“Blessed will be the one who dashes your little ones against the rock.”


Or take Psalm 34:14, “Seek peace, and pursue it;” and Luke 2:14, “Peace on earth, good will toward men [at Jesus’s birth];” and Jesus’s teaching, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God” (Mat. 5:9), and “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you” (John 14:27a).

And compare them with, “Do you suppose that I [Jesus] came to grant peace on earth? I came not to bring peace, but a sword.” (Mat. 10:34); or, “Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division… I have come to cast fire on the earth and how I wish it were already kindled.” (Luke 12:49,51)


Or compare Matthew 5:7, “Blessed are the merciful” with the following verses:

“Leave alive nothing that breathes… show them no mercy.” (Deut. 7:2)

“The Lord hardened their hearts… that they might receive no mercy.” (Joshua 11:20)

“I will dash them one against another, even the fathers and the sons together, saith the Lord: I will not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy them… A curse on him who is lax in doing the Lord’s work! A curse on him who keeps his sword from bloodshed.” (Jer. 13:14; 48:10—NIV)


Or compare Matthew 5:44, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” with “Chase your enemies and they will fall before you by the sword.” (Lev. 26:7)


Or take these two verses that depict the joy of vengeance:

“The Lord will rejoice over you to destroy you” (Deut. 28:63)

“The righteous will rejoice when he sees the vengeance, he will bathe his feet in the blood of the wicked” (Ps. 58:10)

And compare such verses with: “Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and let not your heart be glad when he stumbles… If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink… He who rejoices at calamity shall not go unpunished.” (Prov. 17:5; 24:17 & 25:21)


In Deuteronomy 18:20 Yahweh unceremoniously sentences all followers of other gods to death. Hector Avalos in Fighting Words, adds that “nowhere in Mein Kampf is there anything as explicit as the policy of killing Canaanites in Deuteronomy 7 and 20 and 1 Samuel 15” (361).

For Christians, of course, the “Old Testament” has been superseded but note some of the lessons taught in the N.T. In Galatians 1:8 Paul curses any man or angel who dares to proclaim a contrary gospel, and in 2 Peter 2:1 “swift destruction” is prescribed for all false prophets and teachers. Indeed, according to Acts a husband and wife are struck dead immediately after lying to Peter about having given all they had to the church. And in 1 Cor. Paul states that God himself judges Christians by making “many ill, and some fallen asleep [dead]” because of the unsatisfactory way they had been celebrating the Lordʼs Supper.


To quote Robert Ingersoll: He says: “Honor thy father and mother,” and yet this God, in the person of Christ, offered honors, and glory, and happiness an hundred fold to any who would desert their father, and mother to follow for him. Thou shalt not kill, yet God killed the first-born of Egypt, and he commanded Joshua to kill all his enemies, not sparing old or young, man, woman or child, even an unborn child.


Lastly, itʼs ironic that in the book of Job God reserves his harshest judgment for Jobʼs friends who try to come up with a list of reasons why God was punishing poor old Job, i.e., who try to explain and justify suffering, who are apologists for Yahweh.

Christian publishers admit Christianity's “image problem,” “postmodern turn,” differing rival “views” and…

Image Problem

Evangelical Christian publishers admit Christianity's “image problem,” “postmodern turn,“ differing rival “views” within the Evangelical fold, and speak about “hopeful skepticism” and “questions” rather than dogmatic truths:

Baker Academic

Outsider Interviews, The: A New Generation Speaks Out on Christianity
Statistics tell us that Christianity has an image problem. The authors of this book hosted a national interview tour with young non-Christians and Christians to hear why. Also see Christianity and the Postmodern Turn: Six Views

Zondervan

Perform a search at Zondervan's site for all their books with the word, “views” in their Title, and you will discover a host of Christians arguing for differing views and debating each other inside the same book, check out the list of titles!

Intervarsity Press

Click here to see Intervarsity's books with views& in their title and you will discover (just as in the case above) a host of Christians arguing for differing views and debating each other inside the same book! One new book includes the views of two secular biblical scholars pitted against moderate Evangelical and conservative Evangelical scholars, who critique each other's articles, The Historical Jesus: Five Views. Also see Intervarsity Press's The Hopeful Skeptic, the story of a Christian who heard a little voice telling him to set aside the faith of his childhood. So he changed his Facebook religion status from Christian to “Hopeful Skeptic” and set out to see where God would take him.

Also see the Questioning Faith blog on Intervarsity's site, that recently featured this candid admission:

“Eric: I have been deeply involved in church for most of my life, but over the past few years I have become very unsure of anything. I have read a great deal of history and anthropology and have found so many different societies and cultures have developed religions that claim to be the One. I have found early religions that seem to presage the stories of the Bible, often telling the same stories in different settings or earlier times. It makes me wonder if the Bible is simply carrying on the oral tradition that other, earlier societies had developed. I have tried to discuss my doubts with pastors and with priests and have generally been told to just accept God's Word. “Take it on faith.” When I try to get my head around prayer, I run into too many questions- why have prayer circles, with many people praying for the same thing, when God is supposed to hear even the lowliest of us in our silent prayer? Does God hear a loud chorus more clearly? I wonder if creating a God is just a way to give us something bigger than ourselves to lean on, to ask for help, to rely on. I felt safer when I just didn't allow my questions to come to the surface, but I have had so many uncertainties that they just won't go away. I have read all of the Scriptures and know many of them by heart, but it seems like a sham - at least my belief in them now does. I wish I could just “believe,” but it isn't there for me. How do I stop wondering if God is really there? In addition to all of this, I have lost a daughter, who was so young and innocent and who clearly did nothing to deserve to die. My little sister was born with a serious developmental disability. My mom died very young of a brain tumour. Saying God works in mysterious ways or that He has a plan for us or that they are in His hands is not an answer. At least it seems like a glossing over to try to make me stop asking. What do I do to find my faith, again? I am aching for answers.”

Recent books not published by Christian presses but which demonstrate that people, including former Christians are growing less interested in doctrinal dogmatic replies to their many questions:

God Gets a “D” in Writing Class

Bible Battle

If it was the exact word of God it would be real clear and easy to understand. God's got a way with words, being the creator of language and all.

Bill Hicks (comedian)


Help Stamp Out And Abolish Redundancy

God said to Moses, “Take off your shoes from off your feet” in his redundant way. (Ex. 3:5, KJV)

David Steinberg


In what place soever ye enter into an house, there abide till ye depart from that place.
- Mark 6:10

And what glass soever ye drink from, lift it to your lips till ye put it down. Duhh!
- E.T.B.


Exaggerations Of Biblical Proportions

The Bible contains the same exaggerated speech, boastful lies and holy hyperbole common for its day and age, rather than evidence of special inspiration.

Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ [or flute, NIV].
- Genesis 4:21

“All?” Were the ancient Hebrews claiming that one person in particular brought musical instruments to the world, just as the Greeks portrayed Prometheus as the one human-like god who brought fire down from heaven and gave it to all of humanity? It would appear so, even though stringed instruments and blowing instruments were probably invented numerous times by countless numbers of people over the ages and round the world after someone plucked something or blew into something and enjoyed what they heard.
- E.T.B.


In this passage, Hebrew spies tell their desert-wandering comrades what they found in Canaan:

…all the people that we saw in it are men of a great stature. And there we saw the giants, the sons of Anak, which come of the giants: and we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight.
- Numbers 13:32-33

The spies are clearly exaggerating (cf. Barker, p. 210). If “all the people” were of such great size, one wonders how to account for the apparently normal size of Rahab, the Gibeonites, and others that Joshua encounters upon entering Canaan 38 years later (cf. Joshua 6:25, 9:3-15).
- Peter T. Chattaway, “Giants in the Bible,” RELG 303, March 10, 1994


The camels were without number as the sand of the sea.
- Judges 7:12

If the entire surface of the earth was filled with camels they would not be “without number,” nor would they be as plentiful as “the sand of the sea.”
- E.T.B.


As the host of heaven cannot be counted, and the sand of the sea cannot be measured, so I will multiply the descendants of David.
- Jeremiah 33:22

A Hebrew cultural-centric exaggeration. The number of David's descendants is nowhere near the number of stars in heaven, nor sand in the sea.
- E.T.B.


Among all this people there were seven hundred chosen men left-handed; every one could sling stones at a hair's breath, and not miss.
- Judges 20:16

Seven hundred who could sling stones at “a hair's breath,” and “not miss?” I'm surprised the author's nose didn't grow when he told that one. Even the greatest sharp shooters at the turn of this century, who performed in Wild West traveling shows, and shot cards out of each other's hands, did not retire with all their fingers—because they “missed” some shots by “a hair's breath.”
- E.T.B.


Their slain shall be cast out, and their stink shall come up out of their carcasses, and the mountains shall be melted with their blood.
- Isaiah 34:3

It would take quite a lot of blood to melt a mountain. Isaiah must have been confusing mountains with molehills.
- E.T.B.


The famine was over all the face of the earth…And all countries came unto Egypt to Joseph to buy corn; because the famine was so sore in all lands.
- Genesis 41:56,57

“Over all the face of the earth… all countries… all lands?” More exaggerated speech. Were folks in far off China and Japan and Australia and North and South America “sorely famished” and had to go to “Egypt” to buy corn?
- E.T.B.


[In one of the plagues with which the Lord smote Egypt] All the dust of the land became lice throughout all the land of Egypt.
- Exodus 8:17

Doesn't the Bible use the word “dust” to describe the ground, mud, and sand upon which we all walk as in “the dust of the earth?” Therefore if “all the dust of the land became lice” would not the Egyptians have drowned in lice and the pyramids been adrift in seas of lice? “Knock, knock.” “Who's there?” “Lice.” “Lice Who?” “Run for your lice!”
- E.T.B.


In one plague with which the Lord smote Egypt “all the cattle of Egypt died.” But a few days after that, “all the firstborn cattle died.”
- Exodus 9:6 & 12:29

Another exaggerated way of speaking. Or perhaps the Lord resurrected the “firstborn” among the cattle just so he could smite them again?
- E.T.B.


[The Lord said to the Israelites when they were wandering in the desert] “This day will I begin to put the dread of thee and the fear of thee upon the nations that are under the whole heaven, who shall hear report of thee, and shall tremble, and be in anguish because of thee.”
- Deuteronomy 2:25

A typical Hebrew cultural-centric exaggeration, i.e., to speak of the nations “under the whole heaven… shall hear report of thee… and tremble.”
- E.T.B.


The Exagerrated Abundance Of The “Promised Land”

In the year 1553 Michael Servetus was on trial for his life in Geneva, Switzerland on the charge of heresy. One point raised by the prosecution was Servetus's edition of Ptolemy's Geography, in which Judea (the “promised land” of the Jews), was spoken of, not as “a land flowing with milk and honey,” but mainly meagre, barren, and inhospitable. In his trial this simple statement of geographical fact was used against him by Protestant Refomer, John Calvin, with fearful power. In vain did Servetus plead that he had simply drawn the words from a previous edition of Ptolemy; in vain did he declare that this statement was a simple geographical truth of which there were ample proofs; it was answered that such language “necessarily inculpated Moses, and grievously outraged the Holy Ghost.”

A. D. White, A History of the Warfare of Science with Theology in Christendom, Vol. 1


Exagerrated Promise

I have set my king upon the holy hill of Zion… Ask of me, and I shall give thee the heathen [as slaves] for thine inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for thy possession. Thou shalt break them with a rod of iron.
- Psalm 2:6,8,9,12

The above psalm is believed to have been sung at the coronations of Hebrew kings. Another Hebrew cultural-centric exaggeration. (Though it must be admitted that this psalm later proved popular with some Catholics and Protestants who used it to justify their “breaking” of the “heathen,” driving them into slavery and stealing their land in alleged fulfillment of this exaggerated Biblical promise.)
- E.T.B.


[Jesus said] “The Queen of the South [i.e., the Queen of Sheba] came from the uttermost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon.”
- Matthew 12:42

The Queen's residence, being probably on the Arabian Gulf, could not have been more than twelve or fourteen hundred miles from Jerusalem. If that is the “uttermost parts of the earth” then it is a small world after all.
- E.T.B.


All the kings of the earth sought the presence of Solomon, to hear his wisdom.
- 2 Chronicles 9:23

“All the kings of the earth?” Another silly Hebrew cultural-centric exaggeration.
- E.T.B.


The devil took him [Jesus] up into an exceedingly high mountain, and showed him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them.
- Matthew 4:8

Shown “all the kingdoms of the world” from an “exceedingly high mountain?” I suppose so, if the mountain was “exceedingly high” and the earth was flat. Verses in the Bible's book of Daniel presume a flat earth the same way that verses in Matthew do:

I saw a tree in the midst of the earth, and the height thereof was great. The tree grew, and the height thereof reached unto heaven, and the sight thereof to the end of all the earth.
- Daniel 4:10-11

Instead of an “exceedingly high” mountain from which “all the kingdoms of the earth” can be seen, Daniel pictures a tree “whose height was great,” growing from the “midst” or center of the earth and “seen” to “the ends of all the earth.”

Funny how such flagrantly flat-earth verses appear in both the Old and New Testaments. “Bible believers” will of course reply that such verses are only “apparently difficult” to explain, and not the “real truth” as they see it. But it is the “apparent difficulties” that remain in the Bible, as it was written, and they will always remain there, regardless of all the ingenuity employed in explaining them away.
- E.T.B.


A decree went out from Caesar Augustus that a census be taken of all the inhabited earth.
- Luke 2:1

“All the inhabited earth?” The Romans and Hebrews indulged in the same cultural-centric exaggerations when it came to viewing their cultures as central to “all the earth.”
- E.T.B.


And there were dwelling at Jerusalem Jews, devout men, out of every nation under heaven.
- Acts 2:5

“Out of every nation under heaven?” Another exaggeration.
- E.T.B.


A great famine all over the world took place in the reign of Claudius.
- Acts 11:28

“All over the world?” Another exaggeration.
- E.T.B.


Paul the apostle wrote:

Their voice [of first-century proclaimers of the Christian Gospel] has gone out into all the earth, and their words to the ends of the world.

The mystery is now manifested and… has been made known to all the nations.

The gospel, which has come to you, just as in all the world.

The gospel… which was proclaimed in all creation under heaven, and of which I, Paul was made a minister.
- Romans 10:18; 16:25-26; Colossians 1:5-6,23

Sorry Paul, but “Their voice” (of Christians proclaiming the Gospel) had only reached a handful of churches in the Roman Empire when you wrote the above verses. The Gospel had not reached, nor been proclaimed in “all the earth,” nor “to the ends of the world,” nor “to all nations,” and certainly not “in all creation under heaven,” not like you said it “has” and “was.” (Three billion people on earth still haven't heard “the Gospel,” at least not according to a statement made by the Southern Baptist Convention in 2004.)

The early church father, Iraenaeus, maintained Paul's charade when he wrote: “Now the Church, spread throughout all the world even to the ends of the earth;” “…even though she has been spread over the entire world;” “Anyone who wishes to see the truth can observe the apostle's traditions made manifest in every church throughout the whole world.” (Iraenaeus, Against Heresies, 1.10.1, 1.10.2, 3.3.1-2) Not a very big “world,” mind you, leaving out most of Asia and Africa, not to mention the continents of Australia, North America and South America.


Summation Of The “Exaggerations Of Biblical Proportions”

If an all-wise God had inspired the Bible He would have been able to give its human authors a few inspired geography lessons, just to show them how big the earth really is. Instead the Bible contains the same exaggerated speech, boastful lies and holy hyperbole common for its day and age, rather than evidence of special inspiration.

Furthermore, if the Bible is speaking in an exaggerated fashion when it speaks of “all the earth,” “to the ends of the earth,” “from the uttermost parts of the earth,” “all the inhabited earth,” “in all creation under heaven,” “under all the heavens,” and, “every nation under heaven,” then how can anyone be expected to assume that the statement, “everywhere under the heavens,” as found in the tale of the Flood of Noah isn't also an exaggeration? (It says in Gen. 7:17, “The water prevailed… and all the high mountains everywhere under the heavens were covered.” Why couldn't the phrase, “everywhere under the heavens,” be another exaggeration to make the Hebrew version of the Flood story (which they stole from the Sumerians/Babylonians) sound more impressive and appeal to the cultural-centrism of the Hebrew's? After all, they did also change the name of the story's hero and the name of the mountain upon which the boat eventually rested, just to suit their culture.

Having run across so many instances of cultural-centric exaggerated speech in the Bible one even wonders what is to become of the central Christian boast, the exaggeration par excellence, namely that Jesus died for the sins of “the world?” Believers from every sacred tradition boast that their beliefs affect “the world,” or must be taken utterly seriously by “the world.” Must they? I cannot take seriously many instances in which Biblical authors exaggerate about the extent of a famine, a census, the distance to a queen's residence, the extent to which a message has been spread, the extent of a flood, etc. And, didn't “orthodox” Christian doctrines and theology arise via exaggerating the importance of some of the alleged teachings of Jesus above others (as well as by exaggerating the importance of some interpretations of those sayings above rival interpretations)?

E.T.B.


An Exaggeration Found At The End Of The Fourth Gospel

The Gospel of John ends with this verse:

And there are also many other things which Jesus did, the which, if they should be written, every one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that should be written. Amen.
- John 21:25

“The world itself” could not contain the books of “many other things which Jesus did?” The author of the Fourth Gospel was not displaying much prophetic ability when he wrote that line, I guess he wasn't inspired enough to foresee that we can now store whole libraries in a single laptop computer and accompanying CDs.

Moreover, the books we do have that tell of “things Jesus did,” consist of only four slim “Gospels,” not one of them over forty pages in length. Two of them, Matthew and Luke, even repeat over 90% of what appears in Mark. So the four Gospels minus the overlapping portions would be even slimmer. Not a lot of “books” about what Jesus did I'm afraid. To reiterate the silly last sentence in the fourth Gospel:

And there are also many other things which Jesus did, the which, if they should be written, every one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that should be written. Amen.

Is there a less convincing way for an allegedly “inspired” book to end than with the faltering phrase, “I suppose?”

“I suppose” such a last verse made sense to believers back then, who were being regaled and entertained by ever new and fabulous tales of Jesus's infancy, youth and adulthood churned out by their fellows and incorporated into additional “Gospels” many of which we only know the titles of today. But ending an inspired book with such a silly exaggeration, followed by the faltering words, “I suppose,” does not make much of an impression, not even strictly literarily speaking.

E.T.B.


Exaggerated Commands: “Cut And Pluck” To Avoid “Hell”

Take the following verses:

[Jesus said] If thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
- Matthew 5:29-30, repeated redundantly in Matthew 18:8

[Jesus said] If thy hand or thy foot offend thee, cut them off, and cast them from thee; it is better for thee to enter life halt or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet to be cast into everlasting fire.
- Matthew 18:8

[Jesus also taught] All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. For there are some eunuchs… which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
- Matthew 19:12

The inspired words concerning “cutting off” body parts to avoid being “cast into hell,” along with Jesus's praise of those who “made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven,” made a deep impression on Origin (an early church Father). He castrated himself.

During the sixteenth century both Catholics and Protestants liked to cite the verses about “cutting off body parts” as a justification behind the censoring and execution of heretics in order that heresies might not spread to the rest of the “body of Christ” and the whole of Christendom risk being “cast into hell.”

And in the 1700 to1800s a group of Christians in Russia called the Skoptzies cut off their own testicles and scrotums. Female members mutilated their vulvas, breasts and nipples. (“For the days are coming, in the which they shall say, Blessed are the barren, and the wombs that never bare, and the paps which never gave suck.” Luke 23:29) Furthermore, they taught that if you also removed your penis (or removed both breasts if you were female) you would be granted the highest honors in heaven. Apparently with the aid of a perfect holy book like the Bible and with the promise of the Holy Spirit to “lead believers into all truth,” this was the truth that the Skoptzies came up with. Bodily sexual temptations could lead to hell, so if mutilating the body aided a person in denying those temptations, it increased one's chances of avoiding hell and attaining heaven.

Maybe God could have used less emphatic language and not linked the cutting off of body parts with avoiding hell? “Let him who has ears to hear…”

“Whaaat? I can't hear you, I recently cut my ears off. They ‘offended’ me. And I would rather be in heaven without them than be cast into everlasting fire with them.”
- E.T.B.


Too Much Reverence For The Literal Words Of The Bible Coupled With Too Much “Fear Of God?”
Construction worker Thomas W. Passmore, 32, filed a lawsuit in April for $3.35 million against Sentara Norfolk, Virginia, General Hospital and four doctors over the loss of his hand. Passmore admits to having cut off the hand because he believed it to be possessed by the devil and to having refused twice to allow doctors to reattach it. However, he claims the hospital was negligent in not asking his family to overrule his poor decision.
- Tulsa World (AP), May 14, 1996

According to the story above, Mr. Passmore thought he saw the number “666” on his right hand, and, “If thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee, for it is better to enter eternal life maimed than have two hands and be cast into everlasting fire.” Mr. Passmore sued the hospital for not having reattached his hand, but he is an adult and if the hospital had operated against his will he might have sued anyway for violating his wishes, or maybe even for violating his “freedom of religion,” like when Jehovah's Witnesses deny themselves blood transfusions, and the doctors must comply even if that person is bleeding to death, because the Jehovah's Witness religion interprets the Biblical passage, “the life is in the blood” to mean that blood transfusions are forbidden.
- E.T.B.

Ivan Henk, of Plattsmouth, Neb., whose son, Brendan Gonzalez, age 4, had been missing since Jan. 6, admitted in a courtroom outburst in April that he killed his son. “The reason I killed Brendan is that he was the Antichrist. He had 666 on his forehead.”
- Lincoln Journal Star, April 30, 2003

A thirty-two-year-old Filipino farmer sliced his genitals off with a machete in a fit of religious fervor because he believed his penis was leading him to sin. In a follow-up to this story: He was right, and it worked.
- Jimmy Fallon, Saturday Night Live News

Jimmy Fallon's joke was based on a 2002 or 2003 news story, and not that unusual for the Philippines because every Easter a number of fervent Christians in that country publicly act out Jesus's sufferings: They are whipped, or walk down the road carrying a cross from which they are later suspended with ropes. In a few extraordinary cases, some people have even sought to be crucified, but not to death.
- E.T.B.


An Exaggerated Command: “Give To Everyone Who Asks”

[Jesus commanded] Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not away.
- Matthew 5:42

Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again… But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
- Luke 6:30,35

Next time an evangelical Christian targets you with their soul-seeking missiles, tell them to look up the above verses and read them aloud. After which, ask them for their Bible. If they do not give you their Bible then ask them to please turn to the end of the same sermon in which Jesus spoke the verses above, and read aloud what Jesus said at the very end of that sermon, emphasizing the word “doeth”:

Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father…Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity. Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man… And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man.
- Matthew 7:21-24,26

Remind your evangelical friend that if they do not “doeth” what Jesus commandeth them, they risk hearing Jesus say unto them, “Depart from me, ye that work iniquity!” Is that what they want to hear Jesus say to them? Or do they want to give you their Bible, since you asked them for it?

After they have handed it over, tell them, “Thank you,” and say that you don't want to keep their Bible forever, nor destroy it. You would just like them to read a few books about the Bible, books that take a more “inquisitive” approach to the Bible and Christianity, like Hitting Below the Bible Belt. And then you will return their Bible to them.

Speaking of “giving to all who ask,” here's an idea for the IRS to try. They should print Mat. 5:42 and Luke 6:30 on all tax forms. Beneath the verses should be a little note from the IRS that says, “We ask all Bible believing Christians, especially wealthy televangelists and pastors of mega-churches, to not claim religious tax exemptions this year.”

In fact, I invite everyone to ask their “Bible believing Christian” friends for money every day and keep asking, especially any fat cat Christian ministers they might know. Call their TV stations and radio stations, stand up in their mega-churches, etc., and quote the above verses and ask them for money. There is no limit put on the above commands.

E.T.B.


An Exaggerated Promise: “You Won't Be Hurt”

And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name… They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them.
- Mark 16:17-18

This promise (which does not appear in the earliest known manuscripts of the Gospel of Mark) has inspired crippling illnesses and fatalities, including the death of the founder of the “serpent-handling” sect of Baptists who died from a poisonous snakebite.

Of course, if any Christians truly believe that “if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them,” why don't they move their families to homes built on toxic landfills which they could buy for a prayer?

Toxic Acres is the place for me!
Mark 16 lets me live there comfortably.
Land spreadinʼ out so cheap and wide.
Keep sin city just gimmie that DI-OXIDE!

E.T.B.


Exaggerated Numbers Of People Wandering In The Desert For Forty Years

According to the Bible the number of people who followed Moses out of Egypt during the Exodus was “about six hundred thousand on foot that were men.” (Ex. 12:37) To that number must be added women, children, and a “mixed multitude” of non-Hebrews who followed Moses out of Egypt, raising the total way above the six hundred thousand Hebrew males, and nearer to a grand total of two million men, women and children. That is like the population of New Orleans (or Columbus, Ohio, or San Antonio, Texas), being kept on the move (following “a pillar of smoke by day and a pillar of fire by night”) every day for forty years. The only day of the week they were not moving was the Sabbath day. That's a heap of packing and unpacking—of setting up “camp” and breaking it down again. Of course, God miraculously prevented the Israelites' shoes and clothes from wearing out during the 40 years in the wilderness (Deut. 29:5), and their knee joints too, apparently (though the latter miracle is not mentioned). Plus we are to believe that all the men who were “warriors” walked “outside the camp” (a really huge camp) each time they had to go to the bathroom.

Moreover, there were sacrificial/sacramental duties that also needed to be performed for two million people (must have fit those in at night after they had ceased wandering each day), and the Bible only mentions Aaron and his two sons as being available to conduct all the burnt-offerings, meat-offerings, peace-offerings, sin-offerings, trespass-offerings, thank-offerings for all of the Israelites. (Num. 3:10) Just the number of pigeons to be brought as sin-offerings for newly born children, would have averaged, based on a “multitude” of nearly two million “wanderers,” more than 250 a day, not counting all the bulls, sheep, lambs, rams, goats, and turtle doves needing to be sacrificed for reasons too numerous to mention—and their carcasses having to be bled ceremonially, the fat removed meticulously, the organs burned as an offering to God, and the carcass dragged “outside the camp” to be burned (a camp of perhaps 16 miles in diameter).

Miraculously, these two million or so Israelites left no traces of their forty-years in the wilderness. No traces of encampments, tent holes, potshards (or other items discarded during their marches), nor traces of their daily sacrifices—no evidence of large charred ash deposits nor blackened stones nor bones. (Oddly enough archaeologists have discovered the remains of a small fire in the Sinai wilderness that was carbon-dated back to about that time. But one small fire could not have warmed the alleged two million who marched nearly every day for 40 years up and down the Sinai.)

So staggering are the problems raised by the exaggerated Biblical number of “600,000 males” (an embarrassingly well attested number, repeated three more times in the Bible—on each occasion each separate tribe being numbered, the sum of the results making up the whole), that even conservative Christian scholars have admitted that “600,000 men,” beside children, women, and the mixed multitude, is an exaggeration on par with many others found in ancient Near Eastern lore.

Evangelical Christian, W. M. Flinders Petrie, author of Egypt and Israel (London Society for Promoting Christian Knowledge, 1911) pointed out, “There are… two wholesale checks upon the total numbers. The land of Goshen recently supported 4,000 Bedouin living like the Israelites, or at present holds 12,000 cultivators. To get “600,000 men” with their families out of that district would be utterly impossible. Also on going south the Israelites had almost a drawn battle with the Amalekites of Sinai. The climate of that desert peninsula has not appreciably changed; it will not now support more than a few thousand people, and the former inhabitants cannot have exceeded this amount. How could the Israelites have had any appreciable resistance from a poor desert folk, if they outnumbered them as a hundred to one? Again, we are compelled to suppose that the Israelites were not more than a few thousand altogether. Thus we see that more cannot be got out of Goshen or into Sinai.”

E.T.B.


Exaggerated Sizes Of Armies In The Bible

In the 18th century, Frederick the Great had an army of 83,000 troops when he became King of Prussia. Other states—Austria, France, and Russia—fielded larger armies, but rarely did they approach 100,000 troops. Frederick's greatest victories—Rossbach and Leuthen—involved about 75,000 and 115,000 troops respectively on both sides. Napoleon's greatest victory—Austerlitz—involved about 150,000 troops total. So did Gettysburg, America's greatest Civil War battle. Alexander the Great, who controlled Greece, Macedonia, Thrace (Southern Yugoslavia), and a little bit of Western Anatolia, was able to raise between 90,000 and 100,000 troops total. Yet the Bible says that Hebrew kings, David and Saul, fielded far larger armies than those. King David had 1.57 million troops (1 Chron. 21:5)…or 340,000 plus the muster of Issacher…or 1.3 million (depending on which verses you read). While King Saul could field 210,000 troops. (1 Sam. 15:4)

Did the dry scrubland of Judea—populated by scattered villages and small settlements—raise up armies larger than the Persian Empire's when it faced destruction at Alexander's hand, larger than Frederick the Great's, larger than Napoleon's in all his battles save the invasion of Russia, larger than the Union's and Confederacy's in their epic struggle? Truly such a feat must constitute one of the least heralded miracles in the Bible.

In the ancient world only the greatest powers, such as the Bronze Age Egyptians, Hittites, Assyrians, Babylonians, and later the Persians, fielded armies upward of 50,000 or more…When Egypt's king Ramesses II fought the Hittites at Kadesh in about 1285 B.C.E., he recorded their force as 37,000 infantrymen and 3,500 chariots and said that the Hittites mustered much of the military power of their empire, which covered most of Anatolia, Syria, and a bit of Iraq (Sir Alan Gardiner, The Kadesh Inscriptions of Ramesses II, 1975, p.41-42). Ramesses had possibly the largest army Bronze Age Egypt ever fielded. It is worth noting that in his poetic account of the battle of Kadesh, Ramesses claimed to have personally killed “hundreds of thousands” of Hittites and their allies (Ibid., pp 10-13), and Ramesses probably lost the battle. (Propaganda was invented long before the Israelites appeared.)

William Sierichs, Jr., “Those Amazing Biblical Numbers: Taking Stock of the Armies of Ancient Israel,” The Skeptical Review, Vol. 6, No. 1, 1995


Exaggerated Numbers Of People Slain

According to the Bible, Abishai & Jashobeam each slew 300 men using only a spear (2 Sam. 23:8 & 1 Chron. 11:11). But that's nothing, because Shamgar slew 600 men with an ox-goad (Judges 3:31). And Adino slew 800 with a spear (2 Sam. 23:8) Do ya suppose Adino was the inventor of Shish-ka-bob? Last but not least, Samson slew 1000 men with the jaw-bone of an ass (Judges 15:15). If only their techniques in the lethal arts of the “spear,” the “ox-goad” and the “jaw-bone” had been preserved for posterity, imagine what martial arts films Chinese directors could make today, featuring hundreds of deaths in one long (and obscenely bloody) scene!

E.T.B.


Exaggerated Ages Of The Biblical Patriarchs

It is certain that one cannot build up a chronology on the spans of years attributed to the Patriarchs, nor regard it as factual that Abraham was seventy-five years old when he left Harran and a hundred when Isaac was born and that Jacob was a hundred and thirty when he went into Egypt, for the evidence from the skeletons in the Jericho tombs shows that the expectations of life at this period was short. Many individuals seem to have died before they were thirty-five, and few seem to have reached the age of fifty.
- Dr. Kathleen Kenyon (the eminent excavator of the city-mound of Jericho)


Exaggerated Ages Of The Sumerian/Babylonian Kings Compared With Those Of The Hebrew Patriarchs

According to ancient Sumerian/Babylonian “king lists,” their kings could live for tens of thousands of years, but of course the worthies of the kings lists were not merely men, but gods or demigods (“kings from heaven”), whose ages could consequently be recorded astronomically. The Hebrew authors dealt only with men, and therefore the ages they assigned to them are comparatively modest, less than a thousand years, because above one thousand years is a perspective proper to God alone. (Ps. 90:4). (The Hebrews were partial to that number, “1000,” as anyone can see who does a “search” for it throughout the Bible.)

Interestingly, both the “king lists” and the Hebrew list of the patriarchs are composed of ten kings/patriarchs. And in both lists the number of years that a king reigned (or patriarch lived) dropped after “the Flood.” (The Sumerian/Babylonians had their own “Flood” story that pre-dates the one found in Genesis.) In fact the Babylonian king's ages dropped after their “Flood story” to ages appropriate to the ages of the Hebrew patriarchs before the Flood, i.e., none of the kings after the Flood reigned longer than 960 years.

Professor Bruce Vawtner in A Path Through Genesis, suggests that “Both the Hebrews and Sumerians/Babylonians knew that many more than ten generations had elapsed during these periods. To bridge over the enormous gaps in time, therefore, both of them assigned tremendous ages to the few names that they possessed. While the Babylonians simply set down astronomical figures, none of them under twenty thousand years, the Hebrew author has been comparatively moderate, and above all, he made his ten generations serve a religious purpose.”

But before discussing the ages of the Biblical patriarchs further, one must note that there are three different sources for the Hebrew Bible, the ancient Masoretic text, the Septuagint text, and the Samaritan text, and they record slightly different ages for the patriarchs, and different totals as well if you added all their ages up in a straight line one after the other. The MT gives a total of 1656 years, the Septuagint gives 2242 years, while the Samaritan text gives 1307 year. The MT is the one used in most modern day Bible translations. According to the MT text, Noah is the first man to be born (in the year 1056) after the death of Adam (in the year 930). Thus the author singles out Noah at birth as the beginning of the new generation of post-Adamic man that will follow after the Flood. This contrivance is further strengthened by the Hebrew author's choice to have Methuselah, the longest lived man of the old generation (before the Flood) die precisely in the year when the Flood begins. A clean sweep, therefore, is made of all the patriarchs that preceded Noah and the Flood. And this neatly excludes any implication that the patriarchs were linked to the corrupt world that had to be destroyed, since the last, and the most aged of them dies immediately prior to the Flood. At least that's according to ages given in the MT version of the Old Testament. Secondly, in the MT the age at which the patriarchs “begot,” drops progressively till the beginning of the second half of the list is reached with Jared. Adam, who precedes the first five on the list, and Jared, who precedes the last five of the original ten patriarchs, also lives an identical length of time after “begetting,” i.e., 800 years. Jared also begins his “begetting” 32 years later than Adam, which happens to be 1/2 of the 65 years at which Mahalalel and Enoch (who come directly before and after Jared on the list) begin “begetting.” Enoch, the traditional holy man of the period, who occupies the symbolic 7th place on the list (and whom God “took”) also lived a symbolic number of years (365 being the number of days in the solar year). And simply by doubling Enoch's year at “begetting,” you arrive at Adam's. In fact, all of the numbers of the MT for the ages of the patriarchs, aside from the total age of Methuselah, are in multiples of five or in multiples of five with the addition of seven (seven being the most popular number in the Bible, appearing in various capacities at total of over 500 times). The ancient Sumerian/Babylonian kings list employed a similar fancy of “adding seven” to numbers, like when in two places it explicitly stated that the total length of the monarchic period preceding the Babylonian Flood was “a great sar plus seven sar.”

Other aspects also hint of artifice: In Gen. 6:3 God “allows” man 120 years to live. (“120” is “50” plus “70,” much like the way the ages of the patriarchs in the Masoretic Text of Genesis are all divisible by “5” with the addition sometimes of “7.”) Moses, the supposed author of the passage about God “allowing” man to live 120 years, goes on to live exactly 120 years. Yet in Ps. 90:10 we are told that man lives only 70 years (ah, there's that “7” again). Joseph went to Egypt, and lo, lived to be the ideal Egyptian age of 110 years; then Joshua retrieves Joseph's bones from Egypt and also lives 110 years. Lastly, compare how awkwardly the author of Gen. 11:10-26 and Gen. 25:8 juxtaposes the scene at Abraham's death with the age of his distant relative, Shem, as though he had no idea that people still lived so long as Shem. For the author states that Abraham died “at a good old age, an old man, after a full life,” while Shem, Abraham's 7X great grandfather lived to SEE his 7X great grandson die “at a good old age, an old man, after a full life!” for Shem was, if we take Gen. 11:10-26 literally, alive and 565 years old when Abraham died at a mere 175 years of age.

Vawter's book in chapter 6 and 7 discusses some of the other artifices. All in all, the ages of the patriarchs like the ages of the Sumerian/Babylonian kings, appear mythically larger than life, growing less so the nearer each king (or patriarch) came to the author's actual day. “The Flood” was of course a major disjunction in both their mythologies, separating the world of demi-god-kings (or patriarchs whose father was ”born at the creation and walked with God”) with the latter world nearer to the author's own day.

E.T.B.


Why Evangelical Theologians Grade God's Writing On A Curve

If I was teaching a class in the art and craft of writing and someone turned in “the Bible” as their writing assignment, then I guess I would have to ask God what message he was trying to convey to his readers. His emotions and sentiments, like those of his characters, are on a constant roller coaster ride.

For example, Job 5:2 says, “For wrath kills the foolish man, and envy slays the silly one.” So “wrath” is connected with “the foolish man” yet compare:

Let me alone that my wrath may wax hot against them.
- Exodus 31:10 (See also Numbers 16:46)

The Lord shall swallow them up in his wrath, and the fire shall devour them.
- Psalm 21:9

And God often angrily loses his temper:

That the Lord may turn from the fierceness of his anger.
- Deut. 13:17

He made Israel to sin to provoke the Lord God of Israel to anger with their vanities.
- 1 Kings 16:26 (See also: Ex. 32:10; Num. 11:1,16:46, 32:13-14; Judges 3:8, 2:20; 1 Kings 14:9,15:30, 16:2, 16:7, 16:13; 2 Kings 13:3; 2 Samuel 24:1; 2 Chron. 34:25; Psalm 18:7 & Jer. 44:6; Nahum 1:2)


Or take the story about Moses descending from a mountain holding Ten Commandments, one of which says, “Do not kill.” But Moses saw that some of the people had begun worshipping idols, and he says, “Kill every man your [idol worshipping] neighbor.” (Ex. 32:27)

So, depending on the circumstances, we have either “Love your neighbor” (Lev. 19:18 & the Gospels), or, “Kill every man your neighbor.” (Ex. 32:27)

And the same Moses who taught “Do not kill” also commanded the Israelites to “kill every [Midianite] male among the little ones?” (Num. 31:17)


And what about the use of the word “Blessed” to describe two very different sentiments in Matthew 5:9 and Psalm 137:9, respectively:

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.”

“Blessed will be the one who dashes your little ones against the rock.”


Or take Psalm 34:14, “Seek peace, and pursue it;” and Luke 2:14, “Peace on earth, good will toward men [at Jesus's birth];” and Jesus's teaching, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God” (Mat. 5:9), and “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you” (John 14:27a).

And compare them with, “Do you suppose that I [Jesus] came to grant peace on earth? I came not to bring peace, but a sword.” (Mat. 10:34); or, “Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division… I have come to cast fire on the earth and how I wish it were already kindled.” (Luke 12:49,51)


Or compare Matthew 5:7, “Blessed are the merciful” with the following verses:

“Leave alive nothing that breathes… show them no mercy.” (Deut. 7:2)

“The Lord hardened their hearts… that they might receive no mercy.” (Joshua 11:20)

“I will dash them one against another, even the fathers and the sons together, saith the Lord: I will not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy them… A curse on him who is lax in doing the Lord's work! A curse on him who keeps his sword from bloodshed.” (Jer. 13:14; 48:10—NIV)


Or compare Matthew 5:44, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” with “Chase your enemies and they will fall before you by the sword.” (Lev. 26:7)


Or take these two verses that depict the joy of vengeance:
“The Lord will rejoice over you to destroy you” (Deut. 28:63)
“The righteous will rejoice when he sees the vengeance, he will bathe his feet in the blood of the wicked” (Ps. 58:10)

And compare such verses with: “Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and let not your heart be glad when he stumbles… If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink… He who rejoices at calamity shall not go unpunished.” (Prov. 17:5; 24:17 & 25:21)

God should have slowed down and concentrated more when He wrote the Bible. However, if He had, that would have left theologians with little to do, since it is their job to contrive ingenious explanations that make “perfect” sense out of every verse in the Bible. I suppose English teachers could do the same thing with the papers they grade—they could contrive a host of ingenious explanations to make every exaggerated, contradictory, imprecise statement in a fictional story or research paper appear to make “perfect” sense. But what would be the point in concocting so many ingenious explanations? Simply to spare giving the child a “D” on their writing assignment?

E.T.B.

Additions To Above: Editing Required

In Deuteronomy 18:20, for instance, Yahweh unceremoniously sentences all followers of other gods to death. For Christians, of course, the Tanakh or “Old Testament” has been superseded by a new collection of texts, many of which are similarly belligerent. In Galatians 1:8 Paul curses any man or angel who dares to proclaim a contrary gospel, and in 2 Peter 2:1 “swift destruction” is prescribed for all false prophets and teachers.

Avalos reminds us, “nowhere in Mein Kampf is there anything as explicit as the policy of killing Canaanites in Deuteronomy 7 and 20 and 1 Samuel 15” (361).

Hector Avalos. 2005. Fighting Words: The Origins of Religious Violence. Amherst, NY: Promethus Books. 444 pp.

Review of Fighting Words (2006)
Kenneth Krause

He says: “Honor thy father and mother,” and yet this God, in the person of Christ, offered honors, and glory, and happiness an hundred fold to any who would desert their father, and mother for him. Thou shalt not kill, yet God killed the first-born of Egypt, and he commanded Joshua to kill all his enemies, not sparing old or young, man, woman or child, even an unborn child.

Robert Ingersoll


Armies of Bible scholars and theologians have for centuries found respected employment devising artful explanations of the Bible often not meaning what it says.

J. S. Bullion, Jr.


What Are Bible Believers To Do?

The Bible commands:

Make no mention of the name of other gods, neither let it be heard out of thy mouth
- Exodus 23:13

Keeping in mind such a command, consider someone who eats a bowl of cereal then hops into their Saturn with Atlas tires on a Thursday afternoon in March to go rent the movie, Apollo 13. “Cereal” is named after “Ceres,” the Roman goddess of grain; “Saturn” was a Roman god; “Atlas” a Greek god; “Thursday” means “Thor's day” and “Thor” was a Norse god; “March” is named after “Mars,” a Roman god; and “Apollo” is another Greek god. As you can see, it is a little difficult in today's world to cease mentioning “other gods.” Even the membrane that closes off the vagina on virginal females is named after “Hymen,” a god of the Wedding feast. So how do you avoid “the names of other gods being heard out of your mouth?”

To add insult to irony, “Biblical hermeneutics” is the art or science of Biblical interpretation and is taught in every seminary, yet the word “hermeneutics” is based on the name of the Greek god, “Hermes.”

E.T.B.


Does God “Do” All The Stuff The Bible Says He Does?

By His windy breath the heavens are cleared.
- Job 26:13

From the breath of God ice is made, And the expanse of the waters is frozen.
- Job 37:10

He says to the snow, fall to the earth, and to the rain, be strong.
- Job 37:6

He draws up the drops of water which the clouds pour down.
- Job 36:27

Who hath gathered the wind in his fists?
- Proverbs 30:4

[Clouds] turn around by His guidance.
- Job 37:12

He covers His hands with the lightning. And commands it to strike the mark. Its noise declares His presence; The cattle also, concerning what is coming up.
- Job 36:32-33

His thunder is incomprehensible.
- Job 26:14

Listen closely to the thunder of His voice, And the rumbling that goes out from His mouth, Under the whole heaven He lets it loose, And His lightning to the ends of the earth. After it a voice roars; He thunders with His majestic voice; And He does not restrain his lightnings when His voice is heard. God thunders with his voice wondrously.
- Job 37: 1-5 (NASB)

This just in…God breathed on Chicago, and His mighty thunder incomprehensibly shattered several windows in the Sears Tower.
- E.T.B.


The very god who, according to those who believe in him, made every last electron spin in its orbit everywhere throughout the universe, cannot write a clear, unmistakable volume of instructions to human beings who are supposed to follow his wishes?

Fred Woodworth


If God got a job as an author of technical documentation, he'd be back on the streets within a week.

Overheard on an internet discussion group


Odd, isn't it, that some assume it all to be a divine revelation? If it is all so terribly important, why can we no longer even tell what some of it means?

David Coomler


The Bible is like a badly Xeroxed chain-letter.

- Unknown